¿Quien es el mas cubano? Sen. Rene Garcia, so far

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It’s not like there’s an official contest or anything, but in the last few weeks, Florida Sen. Rene Garcia — chairman of the state’s Hispanic Legislative Caucus — has been destacandose as the most Cuban of the local Cuban-American electeds.

Makes me think of that Laurie Anderson song, Quien es Mas Macho? Except I keep humming the Quien es Mas Cubano? version in my head.

First, there was that free-for-all barbecue at Hialeah’s Amelia Earheart Park to thank his supporters and constituents after he ended up drawing zero opposition in this election cycle (read: spent his unused campaign money).

Then, there was this wonderful salsa with a touch of guaguanco that Garcia graced us with at the opening of the Hialeah re-election campaign office for Miami-Dade Mayor Carlos Gimenez with the mayor’s wife, Lourdes Portela, who is a dancing queen in her own right. Ladra has seen the county’s first lady rule the dance floor a couple of times. But I had no idea the senator could get down like that.

Then, last weekend, he was spotted tirando fichas at the Hialeah Miami Lakes Republican Club domino and guayabera social night fundraiser.

This officially makes him the most Cuban Florida legislator Ladra knows. Former Sen. Alex Diaz de la Portilla might talk the most Cuban (se cae de la mata) and use the most Cuban sayings in his campaigns, but he doesn’t dance. And he’s really kind of European in here, where it counts. And his brother, Sen. Miguel Diaz de la Portilla, may have uttered my favorite and most Cuban line of all time on the Senate floor — “Apples and mameys. That’s a Caribbean fruit.” And State Rep. Eddy Gonzalez may be Mr. “Here Comes Hialeah” up in Tallahassee, pero no es igual.

Garcia deserves the title because he scores in more categories.

Alas, the senator — who admitted to getting “my ass handed to me” in the game — might have a threat to the cubanaso throne: Miami Lakes Councilman Nelson Hernandez looked waaaay too comfortable with a puro in his mouth as he slammed his tiles down — and won the tournament with the club’s executive director, Lorenzo Cobiella.

Plus, Sen. Garcia drank Michelob Ultra while Hernandez ordered Hatuey.

Daaaale. Now that’s Cuban.

So is this.

Sen. Rene “Senator Salsa” Garcia gets down